This Needs to be Addressed

drink beer from here

Me wearing this shirt does not give you the right to talk about what’s underneath it.
For some of you, this won’t be easy to read.

When I saw this shirt on Etsy I couldn’t wait for A) it to be available in the PA version and then B) for it to come in women’s sizes. It’s a fantastic shirt, and what I’m about to say has nothing to do with those who made it, because I love it. I wear it because I think drinking local rocks and am PA proud. Also, I’m going to continue to wear it for those reasons. Never, ever, did I anticipate complete strangers making comments within earshot about it in an absolutely inappropriate way.

I don’t care if you think “well you wore a shirt that says drink beer from here and it’s on your breasts what did you think was going to happen” because you are wrong. I didn’t “bring this on myself”. You put that on me. You saw me as an object, not a person, and felt that you could make unwanted comments about me, my breasts, and my body. The phrase boys will be boys needs to end because technically, it’s harassment, and ain’t nobody got time for that.

And yes, believe it or not I am quite aware that I’m a little more endowed than others. This doesn’t and shouldn’t matter. Even further, you could be saying, “well Tierney is a good sport it’s all good” – and yes, in most cases, I’m an incredibly good sport and not offended or upset by things said around me. I’ve even admitted before that it’s really hard to offend me in any way. In my mind, it’s one thing when close friends and I joke, but it’s entirely different when what I heard happened. That a man behind me in line for a food truck marvels and comments quietly to a friend about “oh so that’s what those are for,” to which the friend tells him “you didn’t say that very loud” and dickwad replies “well I don’t want to get stabbed”. If you don’t have anything nice to say, shut your mouth, especially if you think me hearing you is going to get you stabbed. My reply? “Yes, it is going to get you stabbed” and walked away nicely. PS I’m non-violent so he’s still alive and in one piece, but this isn’t the only comment I’ve heard either directly or indirectly from total strangers – all of them men.

I don’t feel like I victim of a heinous crime against humanity, and I really hate to get up on this soap box, but I’m pretty pissed that I had to hear the things that I’ve heard recently. So, for the record, no you can not drink beer from my breasts and no they aren’t the size that they are because they’re full of beer. If you think that this is okay, then you’re probably the problem.

Ladies, I know I’m not alone. Feel free to discuss open and freely in our comments section, it’s safe here.

18 Comments on This Needs to be Addressed

  1. Well I’m not a lady, but I’d like to say that sadly, this isn’t surprising depending on where you were. We’d like to think that everyone around is are craft beer “ladies and gentlemen” and know how to behave in public, but let’s be honest, that’s not always the case. We leave several very nice festivals about an hour before shut down, because during that time, the people who have just come for a cheap day of drinking beers usually turn it into something just a couple of notches below a frat party.

    The crowds are full of idiots who think that a $30 ticket gives them the right to act however they want, especially after 3 hours of running from on booth to another as fast as they can as if who ever drinks the most beer wins a prize or something.

    Sorry you were subjected to this, as I know it probably wasn’t easy to go through (or easy to resist stabbing a few people), and no one should have to. Bravo for making a stand!

  2. Whether or not a double-entendre was intended, some will see it that way. At most this should elicit a smile, maybe a chuckle to oneself, or maybe a casual,”Nice shirt…” being said to the wearer. In no way does this shirt or the wearing thereof entitle observers to make judgements and statements about the physical nature and/or personality of the wearer. Such statements are simply immature and rude and the sign of a lack of social skills and mental development.

  3. Very well said, young lady! I’m proud of you for standing up for yourself. I’ve never had that problem because I’m not well-endowed, but no woman should ever need to put up with ANY type of lewd comment about their figure or their looks.

    PS, if you need a good knife let me know, I have a few in the house!

  4. Thank you for saying so clearly, and unmistakeable, how so many of us feel. When did women become objects and playthings? A loooong time ago. And it’s not going away anytime soon. But comments like yours help. Please keep sharing them. And by the way, when did #brewbies become a thing? Do we need a #brewtesticles? Or #brewballs??

  5. I completely understand your point and believe there is often too little respect given by men to women that is just unjustifiable. I do however have to disagree with you that somehow by wearing a shirt with this message not only was your experience expected, but you most likely perpetuated this inexcusable behavior whether you think so or not. If I wear a shirt to office that said ” I work with an a$$ hole” ,I should hardly be suprised when I find myself in hot water or at the very least topic of discussion. I can say ” Oh I didnt mean it like that” all I want , but it still would be perceived the way that I know people would perceive it. So I wouldnt go there if I felt strongly or worried about such things.

    • While I understand where you’re coming from, I don’t think that inappropriate and possibly harassing behavior is excusable. In the same mindset, if I wear a plain shirt that’s lower cut that’s not an invitation to talk about my breasts either, just like wearing a short skirt doesn’t have anything to do with my sexual interest in another person.

      I know I lot of people don’t see it the way that I do, but I’m happy that it has at least opened discussion and fostered consideration for what truly is acceptable behavior for both men an women in our society.

      • I agree with you there for sure! And as a single parent of two teenaged girls, I’m more than happy to give any disrespectful and harrassing person a lesson in that department.

  6. Seriously. I am a girl and before I even read your article the picture said it all. Men have sarcastic dirty minds, females have sarcastic dirty minds, people have sarcastic dirty minds. You put on a shirt that said “Drink beer from here”. Granted most people will realize it’s a drink beer from PA shirt, but even with that said the joke is still there. Wear you shirt that you like, but realize the jokes will be there. Do not take offense to what some may say, instead throw back some sarcastic humor to them. There is no reason to take everything so seriously. I have a pair of pretty big girls myself and it’s whatever if someone says something. If I wore that shirt I would have worn it knowing someone would say something…..breathe girl and gain some humor.

  7. Well put. Still too many cavemen running around the craft beer scene. Beer discussion forums can get pretty appalling at times, too. And I disagree with the respondent above: this isn’t a question of having, or not having, a sense of humour. It’s about respect and dignity––and also about working towards creating an environment in which your sartorial selections don’t invite harassment.

    I’d be curious to hear what you think of a piece I wrote last year addressing gender and the craft beer scene:
    http://tempestinatankard.com/2013/11/14/celebration-time-women-and-the-craft-beer-world/

  8. Hi, there! I found this article through Drunken Speculation (http://drunkenspeculation.com/2014/08/18/mr-third-edition-august-2014-check-yo-privilege/) via Thirsty Wench. Like some of the commenters, I’ve been covering sexism and craft beer (my own site is often about gender and food), and the fact that this just keeps happening is really disheartening. I think a lot of us craft-beer people want to think that we’re better than the bullshit sexist drivel that national beer brands push in commercials, but craft beer also has a sexism problem, both from some of the brewers as well as the consumers.

    Thank you for speaking out and writing this! I’m also always looking for feminist beer blogs to follow, so I’m glad I found you here. (Also, Elysian Space Dust is awesome.)

  9. I’ve learned something in the past two weeks that I never thought existed before in the craft beer culture, horrible people. You see the sign everywhere “Good People Drink Good Beer” and for the most part I thought that was true until I posted an article on my site by the CraftBeerVixen. We were inundated with so much hate mail and there’s only one way to explain it, she’s a woman that’s using her sexuality to promote craft through an online personality. At the end of the day, love or hate her online personality, she’s still a person. That’s when I realized the struggle is real, I just never saw it before. I’m sorry this happened to you.

    • I guess what it comes down to is that some people just suck. I read the post she wrote and follow her on Instagram. The slut shaming aspect of our culture needs to end because it’s down right bull shit. I can’t imagine trying to moderate the comments on that post, which is awful. Thanks for stopping by the site, and here’s hoping for a better future!

      • I was glued to my computer and phone for three days deleting hate as fast as it was posted. Since I moderate my comments that wasn’t much of an issue but the social media stuff was crazy! Anyway cheers and keep up the fantastic work!

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